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To Scold or Not to Scold?

By February 25, 2019April 23rd, 2019Dr. Donia Fahim Blog, Parenting Tips, Podcast

Let’s Talk About Super Special Kids & Cake Podcast [Episode 002 / Segment: Special Q]

A lot of parents ask me this question: ‘Can I scold my child?

Whilst there is no definitive answer, I always encourage positive directives rather than telling your child off. Positive directives are where you tell your child what you want them to do; as opposed to telling them what they shouldn’t be doing. For example: saying “please put your coat on so we can get in the car and drive to nursery” rather than “why aren’t you putting your coat on? We’ll be late”.

Use Positive Language when Children Misbehave

The benefit of speaking in this way is that you make your expectations very clear and the language is positive and constructive. I have found that children almost always respond better when praised and spoken to calmly compared to when they are shouted at or told off. Giving choices also helps to make your child feel involved. For example: asking your child things like “what backpack would you like to take? Red or blue?”

The next question parents tend to ask is “What if they’re really naughty?” Of course; this is very normal and first and foremost, please try to remain calm and remember that this type of behaviour is also common. Whilst it can be frustrating, my advice would be to try and not to give your child too much attention. Rather, focus on the positive things within the situation.  Making regular praise for good behaviour also helps a great deal and will make your child inclined to continue doing and being good because they will enjoy this praise. I’ve also found that a reward chart is very popular among children!

The way children misbehave and the reasons why is far too vast to discuss here. But I do hope that the small tips for raising children I’ve given above help you in some way.

Donia x  

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